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Posts tagged ‘Valentine’s Day’

Love Is…

 

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, one some look forward to and others dread. I have been on both sides of the fence on this. I’ve been the jaded skeptic that wanted to avoid the day and the in love romantic hoping to celebrate it.

Now, I’ve come to see it’s not just about couples, romantic dates, gifts, and high expectations. By all means, couples are encouraged to celebrate it if they wish. I do think love should be celebrated all year, not just when the calendar and the mountain of ads urging you to spend money tells you so. However, what is wrong with making Valentine’s Day one of those days?

Some are so anti Valentine’s Day, saying why should we make a big deal out of it when we shouldn’t limit celebrating love to one or two days a year. From that end, yes, we shouldn’t limit it to select dates. That doesn’t mean though that we should be anti love that day in protest. 😉

Love is amazing, for the many who feel it and like I eluded to before, not just for the couples surrounded by it. I no longer dissuade anyone from celebrating love, for many reasons. One of the reasons is the kids in our lives and all across the country. I don’t want to teach our kids to be jaded, skeptical, and wary when it comes to love.

Love is wonderful and so huge for kids, the way they feel about mom and dad, their siblings, nana and grandpa, friends, pets, favorite stuffed animal, dreams for the future, and so much around them. Shouldn’t we encourage them to love love and shower others with it the way we do? Live by example…

Love is great among true and loyal friends, a love that shouldn’t go unnoticed. They see us through dark times and cheer us on during the good, as we do for them. They give us so much love and I think it can be a nice way to show ours to remember them on February 14th. Yes, all year is best, but isn’t that part of the year? 😉

Love is incredible for parents, the bond we feel with our kids is generally quite solid, a connection like none other. I like to do cute things for my kids every year, a little something to show them just how special they are to me. I do random things throughout the year as well, but feel no shame in doing them on Valentine’s Day too.

Love is love, all year, from January 1st through December 31st, that includes February 14th – Valentine’s Day. I do think sometimes it gets over hyped, but overall I think it’s a harmless thing and actually something that can be good. It encourages spending money, yeah, but it also encourages showing those we love how much we care. It’s not necessary to spend a ton of money to shower our loved with the love we feel, but it’s not a bad thing if people want to.

For all the anti Valentine’s Day people out there, I get it, I’ve been there. I do urge you though to respect those who choose to celebrate and for those that do celebrate it, I urge you to respect the wishes of those that don’t. We can be on either side of the should we celebrate it or not and not make the other feel bad for feeling the way they do. For me, I won’t make a HUGE deal out of it, but I won’t ignore it either. To me, it’ll be another opportunity to show those I love how much they mean to me. Love is important to me, all year, tomorrow included. ❤

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The War on Valentine’s Day

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People have varying opinions about Valentine’s Day and Sweetest Day. Now that we have social media, those opinions are flooded all over the internet. One can’t possibly escape seeing them, unless they choose not to be online.

My own views about such days have changed over the years. I was once one who longed to have someone to celebrate it with and do the cute and romantic things. Usually, I was single and I tended to be bitter about it. The exception to that has been that I would still make it special for my son. Even though a lot of the ads and deals are about couples, those days aren’t only meant for couples to celebrate. It’s supposed to be about celebrating love in general.

My views later changed to feeling that it’s just another way for stores and restaurants to make money. I also felt that so many are just greedy and want another excuse to get more stuff. Whenever I would see someone brag about what their sweetheart did for them or complain because they didn’t do enough, I rolled my eyes. Shouldn’t love be about more than just what we can get from others? Is it really so superficial? Do we really need presents to show love to one another?

I still held onto that view, for the most part, even after I got together with my now husband. I am the hopeless romantic type, but I also felt that I didn’t need grand gestures to know how he felt about me and he most certainly didn’t expect them from me either. For the most part, I felt that the greatest gifts you can give or receive are time, energy, and love. Gifts are nice, but they’re not what’s most important.

While I still feel that way, I have also come to see that putting down those who wish to celebrate it isn’t a healthy way to look at things. Since days like these are supposed to be about celebrating those you love, how can I really tell someone they’re foolish for wanting to celebrate them? I think if you wish to do something nice for those you love, do it and don’t feel shame in doing so.

If you’re one that hates those days simply because you’re single and will feel ignored, I would urge you to remember an earlier point that I made, those days aren’t just about couples. You can still celebrate with friends and family as well and have them be meaningful. There were a few years when I was single that I did just that, bought candy and cute little things that didn’t cost much for people at work, my son, others in my family, and my friends. It’s not about how much you spend or if you even spend anything at all. You can make handmade cards and gifts if you want to do something nice. It’s about the thought behind the gifts, not the gifts themselves.

That is something some forget and I am still highly annoyed with those who feel they’re entitled to amazing gifts and trips for these or any occasions really. My opinion on that sort of attitude is to stop being a spoiled brat and remember what your relationship is really about. If you want to celebrate, great, but don’t make it a competition between you and your partner or you and your friends, who can give or get the better gifts. Attitudes like that tarnish any positive meaning behind the holidays to begin with.

My husband and I don’t personally do much to celebrate them, because we feel that we don’t need those days to tell or show our love for one another. We’ve gone out to dinner a couple of times, but that’s been more or less of an excuse to not cook and do dishes than it is to celebrate the holidays. Some years, I admit that I have gotten a few little things for him. (Though other years, I have done nothing.) I am, as I mentioned, the romantic type. I haven’t done anything out of obligation, but out of a desire to give. I do random things through the year as well, just because. That’s just who I am, a giver. But, it’s about a lot more than that. He’s not been one to buy me anything. Do I feel less loved because he doesn’t buy me flowers or shower me with gifts? No and that’s because he shows me daily that he loves me.

Every day, he tells me he loves me. He kisses me every morning before he leaves for work (or going anywhere without me, even the grocery store.) and at night before we go to bed. (and plenty in between) We hold hands when walking somewhere or even when driving sometimes. He rubs my back randomly and now lately with my pregnancy, he’s been rubbing my feet too. He cuddles with me, tells me I am beautiful, and does things like take care of the housework when I am sick or having a very bad day. He worries about me, encourages me, and believes in me. So yeah, sometimes when people brag about the flowers they got on their anniversary or their birthday, I feel a tinge of jealousy. I will say this though, it doesn’t last long because I remember all that he does and how much he cares. He just shows it in different ways than some do.

That, to me, is the key in relationships. Know your partner, your friend, or family member. Don’t expect them to be someone they’re not and find the ways they show their love and loyalty and then cherish those things they do instead of being upset about the ways that they don’t. If you’re the type that celebrates and wants to make a big deal about holidays and other important days, great. But, if your partner isn’t, learn to accept it. Do not try to change them and don’t let them try to change you either. Like I said, for me, sometimes I still do little things because I want to. I know he won’t, but that’s fine. In that way, we’re very different. But, we accept one another as is. If the love isn’t strong enough that it’s too much of an issue, than perhaps it’s not a relationship worth staying in, only you can figure that out. Know your priorities and know theirs and whether they match, whether the bond you share is going to make it through the times when you don’t agree.

All in all, I am going to sum it up this way, Valentine’s Day and the like are days in which we can ignore them or celebrate them. Whatever you decide is your choice and you’re not wrong for whichever side you land on, just don’t try to get others to agree with you. If you want to celebrate, go for it and make it a day to remember. If not and you wish to treat it as any other day, then just make it the best day possible, as we should strive for every single day. Just be respectful of how others feel. 🙂

Called to Love

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On this day, we celebrate the wonderful thing called love

To start, I want to thank the good Lord above

For all the adoration & compassion He gives each day

And for how He blesses me each day more than I can say

 

This day isn’t just for lovers, but for all who are bonded together

For those who don’t just share in the joy, but who stand side by side in all kinds of weather

A day to celebrate love, commitment, friendship, & joy is such a blessed thing

Though it should be done throughout the year, to remember the blessings each day brings

 

We are all called to love each & every single day of our lives

From our friends & neighbors to our husbands & wives

Go out & celebrate the love you feel in your hearts today

But don’t forget to do that every single day in your own special way

Love Shouldn’t Be Bought, But Merely Given

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Join me for a little pre-Valentine’s Day rant

Though before I begin, let me set the record straight

I’m not single, bitter, & jaded, though I once was

Happily taken am I, but my views on this day are ones I won’t recant

 

My view is and has always been this about love & devotion

We should show one another how much we care

But not just on designated days, but throughout the year

Why do so many let the calendar dictate when we show our emotions?

 

And why should we feel compelled to let money fill our needs?

Gifts are nice, but random acts of kindness mean so much more

Like a handwritten note on a napkin, back massage, or perhaps helping out with chores

Not individually, but as a whole, we’ve become a nation full of greed

 

They say that love, friendship, and the like are free

And that is how it should be, not having to spend to show our feelings

It sickens me when I see people talk about how much their beau should spend

For if they really love them, surely it shouldn’t be difficult to cough up the money

 

I know many who aren’t greedy & while a gift is nice to receive

They know it’s the little things that count the most

But, there are too many out there who don’t see things that way

Life is only great when there are gifts to retrieve

 

For me, flowers, candy, and the like are nice things

But I don’t need them to know how much someone cares

Hugs, kisses, laughter, & being able to make happy memories is what matters most

Love is shown best by the way you treat me, not pretty packages tied up with strings

 

So this Valentine’s Day, I choose to spend it without spending

My beau & I both agreed that what matters most is the love we share

So a quiet night in to watch movies, play cards, & cuddle on the couch is what we will do

Focusing not on store bought gifts, but on a love we share that’s unending

 

***NOTE***

For those who want to celebrate the day, I am not saying you shouldn’t. The celebration of love is wonderful, but stop and think about this…is it really necessary to spend a lot of money to show the ones you love how you feel? Make a handmade card, cook something special instead of going out to eat, help your kids make handmade cards for the kids in their class, etc. And if you really feel compelled to spend money, buy one flower instead of a dozen or buy the smaller box of chocolates. It shouldn’t be about quantity, but quality. If your love is real, long lasting, & true…those special in your life won’t be heartbroken that you didn’t spend much. The thought really does count. And hey, remember this when/if you celebrate as well, it’s not just about sweethearts. Love is about family & friendships as well. Celebrate love, all love, and all year long whenever the mood strikes. ❤

Instead of a pricey affair this Valentine’s Day, I choose this instead….

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This Thursday is Valentine’s Day. Instead of going out to a fancy restaurant, we chose to eat bacon cheeseburgers that we had once before at a local pub within walking distance. We might get in our two free weekly practice games at the lanes we bowl league at or we’ll just watch some Archer on DVD. We’re not buying one another pricey gifts or doing anything out of the ordinary. Why? Some people are into that, we’re not. We choose to treat it as another chance to spend time together, as another simple date night. We don’t need a date on a calendar to celebrate our love, we do this throughout the year. I don’t offer the world on a silver platter, but instead I offer my mind, heart, and soul to the one I love. How do I best convey what’s going on inside the many facets of my mind? Well, usually I do this through the gift of poetry….

 

The ground is slick

The rain froze from the night before

Walking along as carefully as I can

About halfway there, I begin to fall

You catch me before my head hits the ground

 

Since you’ve entered my life

That’s how it’s felt

Before I hurt myself

There you are, catching me

Saving me from myself

 

My brain tries to make sense of this

From a mental and emotional perspective

You have had so many chances to run away

To rid yourself of the mood swings and insecurities

Would I have really been able to blame you if you had left?

 

You see something wonderful in me

A light in the darkness

The rainbow in my heart after the storm it raged

Holding my hand throughout it all

Always believing in me and in us

 

I have cried so many tears in the past

It was really hard at first to let that go

To trust, to let the walls of uncertainty fall

Looking in your eyes now

I see there’s no longer a need to hide from the world

 

You encourage my dreams

Push me to move forward

Melting away doubts in myself with your certainty

You have made me believe

In you, in us, and in me

 

If ever I question your feelings for me

I just have to stare into your warm brown eyes

They light up brighter than any star

They smile at mine

And pour out devotion, compassion, and love

 

The world around us doesn’t disappear

We don’t need to escape reality

We have learned how to dance in the rain

Smile and laugh through the rough moments

When the world grows colder, our love grows stronger

 

I could imagine a world where it was just the two of us

Everything is green beneath our feet

The air so sweet, tasting of cinnamon and honey

No harsh winds or rain to dampen our days

Sunshine and eternal peace

 

But that would be boring

And unrealistic

Nothing and no one is perfect

Embracing the difficulties and seeing your way through

That is when you realize how strong and how true love is

 

Adversity must be faced

Trials will come along

Do you last or do you break apart?

It’s not been long for us

But already we have faced so much together

 

Looking back through it

I know we made it because we had one another

Holding your hand in mine

Seeing the love in your eyes

I finally believe if it’s humanly possible, we will achieve it

 

So here we stand together

Ready to face what life has in store for us

Some things will be great and some not so wonderful

It’s going to be one heck of a journey

I am incredibly excited to see the path that lies ahead

 

~* This is my true gift to you this “Let’s spend unneeded money” day, my devotion and love. For Doug, yesterday, today, and for all the tomorrows we’re given. *~

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