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Posts tagged ‘silence’

Silence Speaks

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Silent days turned into months

Though no words were spoken

And no cruel deeds were done

A once close bond was broken

 

No one knows when it all began

When or how silence crept in

How it slowly extinguished a once strong flame

Sadness and regret are now found within

 

Once upon a time, the walls were full of joy and laughter

And through any hard times, love and support were given

How did a once great friendship become something like this?

Once fueled by love, they’re now fear driven

 

Afraid of change and afraid of failure

They don’t try to repair what’s not right

Unhappy, yet comfortable in what they’ve become

Plans they made, now faded from their sight

 

Some say it’s mean words and awful things done that ruin relationships

And sometimes that’s found to be very true

But other times, what kills a bond between two people is something else entirely

Sometimes it’s silence, indifference, and when people pull away that weakens the glue

 

Any relationship, with family, friendship, or between lovers needs some key things to survive

Trust, loyalty, respect, and love are high on that list

But there is so much more than that which helps a relationship thrive

Working together, having fun with each other, and communication sometimes are missed

 

Sometimes what drives two people apart wasn’t an issue from the start

And it doesn’t often happen right away

It’s, many times, caused from a long period of miscommunication or emotional distance

A successful relationship requires hard work from both people nearly every day

 

Harsh words can cut like a knife, this is true

And often cause more damage than physical damage done

But, let’s not forget that silence can speak just as loudly and cut just as deeply

Let’s speak and do it with love, most especially in the darkest times, so that the battle against broken hearts can be won….

 

 

*Photography done by myself, taken at the Milwaukee County Zoo last October.*

 

 

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Yes, words escape even me sometimes….

I have been known throughout my life to be one who often has the right thing to say to someone, who can help, who often knows how to cheer one up, who knows how to make things better, & who has great advice. (though doesn’t always take it myself. *laughs*) I have been called an Empath since childhood. Even if I haven’t been through something, I am able to put myself in their shoes, and feel the emotions as if I were going through it myself…which has often led me to being able to be there for others.

Sometimes that “gift” can be a bit overwhelming, especially when going through a lot myself at any given time. Taking on my problems and others can be a bit daunting, but overall I am glad I have the ability to be there for so many people. I am the helper, healer, giver, motivator, and I am okay with that most of the time. Now and then, I need that in return, but usually I am alright.

However, there are times when someone is going through something and even I lack the proper words to say, sometimes I just don’t know what to do. I wish not to offend anyone and I know that there are times that while something might comfort me, it might not be what helps them. Sometimes all I can really do is be there, listen if they need me to, hug them, cry with them. I know that means a lot, but sometimes I feel horrible when I can’t heal, fix, or change the situation. I should not beat myself up over it, some things in life just can’t be made better. Sometimes all we can do is find ways to help people cope, it’s just difficult sometimes to do.

Today would be the 33rd wedding anniversary for my boyfriend’s parents. His mom died on November 17th, 2012. It’s been a bit rough for him, his sisters, his dad, and her parents. Getting through their first Christmas, New Years, some of their birthdays, etc has been difficult for them. I never know quite what to do or say when I know they’re hurting.

She had an obsession with the number three, hence May 3rd being their anniversary. She even felt the need to have three kids, even though Doug’s dad was fine with two kids. I am grateful for her love of the number three, Doug is their third child. 🙂 Anyway, so this would have been a major anniversary for her, it being the 33rd. Doug’s dad is struggling with this and tonight they’re going out to eat at a place they liked to go have pizza, play cards, and just have a good time as a family. I have been invited, so I will go, to show my support for Doug and Phil. I don’t know if either of his sisters will be there, but I can imagine either way that today must be hard for them too, especially with Mother’s Day being next Sunday. My heart breaks for them as I type this. My eyes sting from the tears and I have to keep pausing so that I can wipe the tears away.

My mom and I haven’t always been close. In fact, we’ve been “at war” as it were for years at a time. We’ve begun the healing process and I am grateful to be where we’re at now, even more so considering the many I know who don’t have their mom around anymore. I wish I could take the pain away from Doug, from his family. God had a reason she was to leave at this time, one we don’t understand, especially given the circumstances…but we know God is good. Doug has an amazing family, so grateful they have one another to lean on through all of this. Doug tells me that my support means a lot to him and I know that it does. Still, sometimes I wish I could do more. Sometimes I wish I had just the right words to say, that there’d be a way to make things alright for him, for all of them. I have grown to love not only Doug, but his family as well. I know I can’t make things right, all I can do is be here. Though it doesn’t feel like enough to me, I know it’s all I can do right now, and I know that through my lack of words, Doug knows I care and will support him through this and everything we each face….because we’re no longer going through things alone, we face things together.

I pray for healing and for peace for Doug and his family. Let their love for You and for one another help them through this. And help those surrounding them to be of comfort to them, to be patient, to be understanding, to be caring, to just be there. Maybe we won’t have the right words to say, but just allow us to be the comfort and care that they need. I also pray for my cousins Chris, Scott, & Kari…and their dad, Mother’s Day will be rough for them too as they still struggle with the loss of their mom, my aunt Debbie. I pray for all who will struggle to get through that day, as many have lost their mom. I also thank You for giving me more time with my own mother. I am blessed. I often complain about what is going wrong in my life, beg for a job lead to pan out, ask for financial help, whine about the weather, complain about not feeling well or about feeling “old”….but there is so much to be grateful for. Thank you for the many blessings…..for my parents, my step-mom, my son, his dad and step-mom, for my siblings, for my remaining aunts and uncles, for my cousins, for my nephews, for my niece, for my boyfriend, for his amazing family, for my friends, for my life, for my gifts and talents, for YOUR love….thank You. 

I pray that today is a day to remember and rejoice in the good times…somehow they will get through today as they have the other days that were especially hard for them…they will get through them because they love You and one another, their love and support will help them through…sometimes words can’t make things better, but love and support surely goes along way, even when it’s silent. ❤

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