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Posts tagged ‘lessons’

Things Our Kids Should Know

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I was thinking this morning about classes I had to take in high school and how very little of it I’ve used in my adult life and I weighed it against things I didn’t learn that I do use.

I think classes such as Algebra and Trigonometry should be replaced with Taxes & Budgeting, D.I.Y. Home Repairs (minor leaks in plumbing, how to unclog your toilet, how to weather proof your windows, etc), and Basic Car Repairs (oil changes, checking and filling the fluids, brakes, change a flat tire, etc). I think we should all know how to balance our budget, do our taxes, and do basic home and car repairs.

The generations are getting lazier as they go on. We have machines, applications, and expensive services to do our work for us and so we let them. I say it’s time to reintroduce good work ethic and the desire to learn and do things for ourselves to the younger generations. Stop teaching them things that they won’t need in their adult life and highly promote things they will need to know.

Furthermore, let us as parents stop encouraging laziness and activities that keep them glued to screens. Video games, surfing the net, and the like are fun and there’s nothing wrong with participating in things like that as long as they’re age appropriate and we have them spend time doing other things as well.

What happened to spending the day outside with their friends, going to the park, swimming, arts and crafts, learning to play an instrument, enjoying music, being a part of a sport’s team, camping, reading, telling stories, etc?

I am trying to instill a passion for the arts and for staying active in my teenage son’s life. He’s so consumed by video games, YouTube videos, etc and so are many his age. I’m trying to encourage time away from all of that and broadening his interests. I don’t want my son to think the world revolves around technology, even though it seems to. There’s so much more out there to experience!

I also want him to be well taught in how to do things he’s going to need to know when he’s on his own. Sadly, he won’t learn many of those skills in school, so I’ll teach him what I can, have him learn what he can from his dad and step parents, and hope that college and/or his trade/military will help push him further forward.

We are our kids first teachers. Let us guide and teach them well! Let us prepare them, as best as we can, for their lives apart from us. And may we spend as much time as we can enjoying our time with them and creating wonderful lifelong memories.

Let us give them roots, show them where they came from, instill manners and good values, and teach them valuable lessons to take with them into adulthood. And let us help them grow up to be people that believe in themselves, people that are courageous, bold, and ready to follow their dreams. Let us teach them how to fly out into the world on their own. And never may we fear that they’ll forget us. They can fly away, yes, but they can fly home too and even if they live far away as adults, hopefully we’ve taught them too that we’re where their home is also. ♡

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My 20’s versus my 30’s

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I remember when I was my son’s age, 12, thinking that 30 was old. And when I reached the age of 20, I still thought 30 seemed a lifetime away and surely when I reached it, my life wouldn’t be the same. Well, I was right about that, though not in the ways I thought back then. I remember thinking that once you reached your 30’s that life would be more boring, that I couldn’t possibly enjoy my life like I did in those moments of my most cherished youth.

As my 20’s progressed, I began to see that life wasn’t turning out the way I once thought it would and so many things I thought I knew about life were proved wrong. I must say that my 20’s were definitely full of excitement. There were so many parties, adventures, random road trips, and explorations. There are many days I can’t quite remember though and while we would laugh about such things with one another, truth is, it was sad that there were hours of my life when I couldn’t recall what I had said or done. But, such was the life back then for me and many others I know, and many others around the world too for that matter.

While my party days of my 20’s could be a blast, it is quite accurate to say that it was not all fun and games. With that partying also came being sick, injuries, death to loved ones because of reckless behavior (drinking and driving – not because of me, but it very well could have been due to many stupid decisions I made.), near death experiences, drama, drama, and more drama, heartbreak, and so on. I have learned a lot of painful lessons and often times, the hard way.

My 20’s were full of a lot of irresponsibility, careless actions, unwise decisions, and rash behavior. Now, I am not going to say that I didn’t enjoy my 20’s at all, because I do have a lot of great memories, made some great friends, and still have inside jokes that many of us still laugh about to this day. And, I can’t say that I just screwed everything up and didn’t do the right things at times. I wasn’t an airhead, but sometimes I made people wonder. I look at some people in their 20’s now and think, “Was I really like that?” And the answer, dear readers, is yes and sometimes much worse.

I am now 36, approaching 37 at the end of this year. Looking back at my frivolous days of my 20’s and then looking at my life and who I am now, I can tell you there are some major differences. The me back then and the me now would have quite the conversation should they be able to speak to one another. When I was 26, I said I wanted to find someone special, settle down, finally establish myself on a good career path, do better for my son, and behave more responsibly. But what I said I wanted and how I often behaved didn’t match up. I still was so selfish a lot of the time, though I wouldn’t bring myself to admit that. I worked here and there, wasn’t there for my son like I should have been, stayed up too late most nights, partied too hard with my friends too often, chased after the wrong guys, and just made a mess of my life. You’d think by 26 that I’d start to get a handle on things and I was making progress, but not nearly enough.

It’s so weird, when I turned 30, it’s as if a light switch went off in my head. It didn’t happen overnight, but turning 30 was really a turning point in my life. It’s as if the mist surrounding my head began to lighten and the fog began to lift. I began to see just how badly I needed to change, how my priorities needed to shift. I started going out less, trying harder to better my life, and began truly growing up. Life started to be more about my son, family, and working hard.

When I was 26, I lived with my grandma, had my son very sparingly and never knew when I’d see him, worked a seasonal job at the ballpark, and worked here and there on the off-seasons, hung out with a lot of people I shouldn’t have, and did things I am not proud of. My younger days were even more chaotic. At 19-23, oh it was even more wild. At 23, I got pregnant with my son and during that time, I did pretty well. I didn’t drink, took care of my body, and tried to change. At nearly 24, my son was born and then it didn’t take long before fear I’d ruin my son’s life the way that my parents had ruined mine and selfish wants took over. I have always loved my son, but back then, it wasn’t enough to do what I should have. It was about me, but I said it was to protect him, to spare him of the life I had. To a point, I did believe I wasn’t any good for my son, but that was also because I was afraid to try, only to end up failing. I didn’t give my son every effort he deserved and for that, I’ll always feel horrible. I am getting better at forgiving myself, my son already has. I know too that I can’t make up for time lost, but I can be there for him now.

And that’s exactly what I’m doing. Fast forward to present day if you will. I now find myself working a stable job that I love that more than pays my bills and takes care of Zach’s needs when he’s with me, have a schedule with my son and am overjoyed at being a much bigger part of his life, am engaged to a wonderful man who loves us both that has always been there for us, am a member of a church that really helps me grow in my faith, and have surrounded myself with a good group of friends that I can trust and that I don’t let take me down dark paths. If anything, if I start to have problems, they’re right there guiding me back to the right path. Life is truly wonderful, the best it’s ever been. I am much happier in my 30’s than I was in my 20’s. I finally look in the mirror and see someone I am not ashamed to look at, someone I can really love and respect. If you asked me to go back to my 20’s, I wouldn’t. Truthfully, I feel the only way to go is forward. ❤

Life’s Many Blessings

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I remember when I used to write in my blog daily and sometimes it was even more than once a day. Now, I am lucky if I write in this once or twice a month. It’s not that I have less to say, just less time to say it online. I have become so busy that I just haven’t had the time to really sit down and put my thoughts into writing. Sometimes I feel badly about that. Though, I know I am just out there living my life.

As Thanksgiving draws ever nearer, I am humbled more and more. I have so much to be thankful for. I wanted to take another opportunity to express that. There is a lot I could complain about, but there’s even more I can say thanks for. I think that’s something I should remind myself of more often. When I am having a tough day, I should tell myself how good I have it, and to not sweat the small stuff. It can be oh so easy to get upset over someone cutting me off on the road, someone being rude, something at work not going right, just not getting a good night’s sleep, and so on. Sometimes it’s hard to have the right perspective, but I know it can be done if worked on.

I know I will have rough moments and sometimes, rough days. But, my goal is to get better at appreciating what I have more and complain less. What I have can always be taken away and that’s something we should all remember. Our material possessions, money, and even our loved ones can disappear. Nothing lasts forever, not the good, but not the bad either. So, I need to get through the bad and learn from it, because there’s always something to learn, something to take from things. And, I need to appreciate the good much more. So, here I am today to say how very thankful I am for all the blessings in my life. The way I look at it too, the bad moments are blessings in disguise because so much good has come from it all in the end. For all I have learned, for all I have gone through, for all I have lost, for all I have gained, for who I was, for who I am, and where my life is headed…..I am deeply thankful.

So tell me, what is something your past has taught you? What are you thankful for??

Our Lives As Stories

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Every life is full of ups and downs

Sad moments and cheerful ones

Each journey has many stories to tell

They can inspire and help others

Each path we take, every time we stumble and fall

Even the ones we may feel don’t matter

Or the ones that are too devastating to share

They help light the way for others who are in dark places

Tell your stories, let your voice be heard

Write them upon the hearts of others

Show those around you that they’re not alone

And that there’s always a way through

Let people laugh with you and cry with you too

As you share with others, let them also share with you

For they too have lessons learned and wisdom to offer

May our lives come together, touch one another

I pray that my story has been and will continue to help others

Show them that others suffer, but that there’s a way out

There’s a way to heal, to forgive, and move forward

And that there’s more to life than just pain and sorrow

May they also see that there’s so much laughter and joy to be had

That there’s so much to live for, no matter how tough times might get

And that there’s so much love to both be received and taken

Never lose sight of that, hold onto hope, faith, & love all the days of your life

May my story be etched upon your soul, may it live with you

And may yours stay stay with me as well, always teaching me

Let us remember that it’s not just about one person, it’s about all of us

Co-existing in this big crazy mixed up world

Though each light can shine on its own

And even the smallest voice can be heard

Never think you’re not enough to make a difference

It all begins with just a spark

I’m telling my story for all to see

Hoping it does make a difference

Even if it’s just in the lives of a few

So how about you?

Life: Live It

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When the rain falls, don’t hide yourself away

Learn how to dance your way through the storms

And when the sun is shining brightly upon you

Don’t take a single minute of that for granted

 

Life is a series of ups and downs

A crazy roller coaster ride of emotions

There are lessons to learn

And memories to be made

 

Your heart will be broken

And you might break a few yourself

You’ll know loss and pain

Disappointment and strife visits us all

 

And while there are times it seems easier to give up

In the end, it’s always worth it to find your way through

Even though it may not seem that way at the time

The dark times don’t last forever

 

Though neither do the good ones

So when they’re upon you

Remember to appreciate each moment

Cherish every laugh, smile, kind word, and embrace

 

Love boldly with every fiber of your soul

Don’t let loss or fear of rejection hold you back

Feel every single emotion unashamedly 

Embrace change, take risks, and always be true to yourself

 

We were born to be an individual work of art

Original, truly one of a kind

Don’t blend in just to gain acceptance 

Or even just to go unnoticed

 

Life isn’t always easy

And we don’t always understand why

Or how things happen the way that they do

But it’s all worth it in the end

 

Having faced lots of loss and pain myself

I have come to realize that life is short

Quite fleeting and fickle

Taking us from this world many times without notice

 

And I have decided that I want my life to mean something

For however long I am to walk this earth

I want to have touched people’s hearts

To love those around me with all I have each day

 

For without love, what is there really?

I know that is why I am here

To be a friend, to help, to give, to heal

That is what I will leave behind, a great legacy of love

 

(And I encourage you to do the same.)

The Past, Present, & Future

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It’s easy for us to admit when we trust the wrong people with our hearts, whether it be in friendships, family bonds, and most especially in romantic relationships. How easy is it though to admit when we’ve been the wrong one for someone else? Admittedly, I have been on both sides of the fence. I have both given my friendship, loyalty, and love to those who didn’t deserve it and I have been the one undeserving of theirs. In the end, I regret nothing though because I have learned something from each of them, been taught valuable lessons about my self, and even if it was only for a brief time, I also knew joy, laughter, and made good memories. My life now as it stands is wonderful. The rocky and sometimes painful path it took to get here has been absolutely worth it.

Thank you to my past for teaching me lessons, sometimes the hard way. Thank you for the struggles, pain, and even loss for giving me courage and strength. Thank you for the laughter, friendships made and even lost, for the memories and the love. Thank you for who I was so that I can be who I am now. I’m sorry for the pain I caused anyone, more than I can say. My guilt drove me initially into depression, but eventually it led me to changing and for the better.

Thank you to my present for the many blessings in my life and for continuing to teach me and help me grow. Thank you to my future for offering up such hope and promise of wondrous things to come. To all in my life now, thank you for all you do. Your support, loyalty, and love means more to me than I’ll ever be able to say. Today, I see now that I’ve chosen wisely as I have great friends and an outstanding boyfriend that is also my best friend. My sincere hope is that you feel the same way about me.  The sun is shining today and with its bright light, I look upon today with hope, a grateful heart, and love for my life and all of you that chose to be a part of it. I love you all.

Along The Roads You Travel

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I can’t believe how these last eleven years have flown

Looking at where once a small boy stood, I see just how much he’s grown

Once he took naps, liked to cuddle, & needed my help for everything

And as I look at him as he is now, I wonder what the future will bring

 

I try not to worry & just place it all in God’s capable hands

But there are times when I wonder if he’ll go off to distant lands

To defend our great country, only to never return

Or that the future will leave him ill, severely injured, or emotionally burned

 

I know it’s useless to waste hours upon hours worrying about a future unknown

He isn’t ready to leave the nest, away from me he hasn’t yet flown

As parents, we should cherish each & every stage

Embrace every single year that they age

 

So quickly they grow before our very eyes

We just have to hope that our lessons make them wise

And our love nurtures their starving hearts

Enabling them to return that love to those around them from the start

 

I don’t know what will become of you, young man

But I have faith that for you, God has a plan

And no matter what happens along the roads you travel

Know that my love for you will never unravel

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