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Perfect Parenting

14

Many parents have their idea of what perfect parenting is, a style they feel works best and it will often vary from another’s. The thing to remember is just because someone’s views on how to raise their kids is different from how you raise yours, it doesn’t mean they’re wrong or less of a parent. So many sit in judgement and it’s not okay.

It doesn’t matter if you, say, breastfeed and other moms don’t. What some don’t understand is not everyone can do it. Some moms just don’t produce, no matter what they try, some babies refuse to latch, etc. And even if someone can and chooses not to, it doesn’t make them a bad parent. The same goes for whether someone makes their own baby food and another may choose to use the prepackaged stuff, such as Gerber. Either way, the kids are getting their nutrients and are developing just fine. What about potty training techniques, how one might get their baby to sleep, disciplining, how they teach their kid to read, whether or not their kid gets paid to do chores or not, how early they start helping out around the house, curfews, whether their kids go to private or public school, or perhaps neither and they do home schooling, and many other parenting topics.

I’ve been the parent that has had others point, stare, and whisper. I have also had the nosy moms that don’t know the situation butt in while at the store, throwing their unwanted two cents in and have seen it happen to others. It is infuriating to have another try to tell you how to raise your kids. If we don’t like something, fine, it’s our right to disagree. However, just because we can verbalize our difference of opinion, doesn’t necessarily mean we should. Sometimes it is best to keep our thoughts to ourselves. And honestly, where do any of us get off judging another because we don’t give into a child’s tantrum, because we let them have McDonald’s once in awhile, are on a different sleep schedule, decide to home school our kids, bottle feed, or use a different method of punishment for acting out? If the child in question isn’t being abused or neglected, it is really no one’s business how they’re being raised. If there’s genuine reason for concern, fine, but then go about it in the proper manner. If not, it is usually best to butt out.

Sometimes we will ask for advice or help, I mean, they say it takes a village. 😉 Sometimes too, we see someone struggling and we want to be there for them. That is all well and good, but then when we’re coming from a place of kindness and not a harsh or judgmental one, we need to still respect our boundaries. Never put the parent down and don’t make it all about you and how you raise your kids and ALWAYS listen, be respectful. Parenting can be challenging at times and it makes it that much harder when we have others essentially bullying us because we’re not doing things “right”. We want our kids to turn into well rounded, kind, smart, and hardworking adults, which is made easiest when we have a good support system and try our best not to judge one another. These are just my thoughts on it today and not just in parenting, but in life. We should lift one another up, not tear one another down. ❤

Love is Stronger than Hate

Love-Heals

Hate is powerful and it destroys all it touches, causes great devastation in its wake. Hate fuels a mind to do awful things and sometimes it seems like there isn’t a weapon strong enough to stand up against it, so we lose hope.

Yet there is something that is more powerful that can be wielded against it, something that can triumph. Love is a force that can overcome hate’s strongest arsenal, against its every attack. Love is what hate fears most. If we, one person at a time, seek within ourselves that strength, we can stand up to hate.

It’s natural when provoked to get defensive, lash out with harsh words and hurtful actions. That’s what hate is counting on, for us to let anger, jealousy, greed, spiteful behavior, and the temptation to succumb to the dark parts within us to win.

It takes true strength to resist the dark sides within us, to find the good and let it prevail. When we know love, both how to give and receive it, it’s easier to listen to the goodness we have in our hearts. Sometimes it’s hard when we’ve been hurt to trust in love’s existence and in its power to heal. It’s easier sometimes to build walls and keep it out, to try to prevent it from hurting us again. What we don’t always see is that it’s not love that hurts us, it’s the absence of it that does.

It took me awhile to see just how strong and wonderful love really is, but now I know its power and refuse to turn from it ever again.

I’m grateful for love. I’m blessed with knowing many forms of it. I have God’s love with me everywhere I go, a love that overcomes everything. I have the love of two wonderful kids, a love that lights up the darkest days and shows me what it’s like to love another without reservation, a love that will last as long as I live. I have the love of an amazing husband, the kind of love one reads about, but isn’t sure really exists. He’s my best friend and partner. I have the love of family, a bond both bound by blood and something more special. I have the love of incredible friends, a love not bound by blood, but something just as strong. What’s even greater still is that I have the love to give back, love that inspires and fuels me daily. To be able to give and receive love is the biggest blessing I have been given.

Let love fuel you, heal your wounded heart, help you let go of anger, and inspire you to show it to others, so it may help them as well. Show a little love today!

What Happens When You’re Busy…

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WordPress notified me that I just celebrated five years! Wow, it’s been that long already?! I noticed it’s been quite awhile since I have posted. I kept meaning to write and then I’d get distracted. I apologize for not touching base in a few months. I hope all is well in WordPress land!

I mentioned awhile back that I started my photography business, been doing a lot to get that going. Today, I even created a WordPress business site: https://carissagrayphotography.blog/ Please check it out! That has been keeping me pretty busy, that and being with my family. My daughter turned one in April and my son graduated eighth grade in June. They’re growing so fast! My son passed me in height recently, leaving me both happy for him and a little sad. He starts high school this fall. When did he get to this point? It’s hard to believe some days just how grown up he is getting. My little girl is growing ever more comfortable on her legs, walking all over the place and learning to climb onto things. She talks a lot, can’t understand much of it, but some words are clear as day, like stop, even says it when she’s done eating.

Summer is already halfway over and yet it feels like it just begun. We have made it to a couple Brewer games and had a couple cookouts. I hope to do more before the summer is done, but we shall see how things pan out. What have you all been up to this summer? Have you done anything fun? Have you taken any trips? Share with me your adventures!!!! I want to live vicariously through my readers. 😉

I hope to hear from you all soon!!! Please show me you read this by commenting, let us chat! I miss our chats, lovelies! Until then, much love!!

The Path Before You

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No longer a child and yet not an adult either

Caught in between and feeling frustrated

You don’t want to be treated with kid gloves

And yet you feel suffocated by the responsibilities

“Where am I headed?”, you wonder

 

The road ahead has many forks you could choose

The path before you is yours and yours alone

And, my son, do not let your mind worry so

There is no need to know your direction today

Just keep your eyes and options open

 

Both scared and excited about your future

You have many ideas about what you’d like to do

And unsure of which one to stick with

I truly believe that you’ll do quite well

No matter which path you choose

 

Don’t be afraid to listen to advice

Many have much wisdom to offer you

But, don’t let them dictate what you decide

In the end, your future is yours and not ours to lead

One foot in front of the other, one day at a time

See the Beauty & Be the Beauty

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If I could only paint you a beautiful picture

Showing you the wonders that await you

So I choose to use my words instead

No rhymes and maybe less than eloquent

But, perhaps you’ll still see the beauty within

 

Spacious mountains and crystal clear waters

Beautiful flowers, statuesque trees, & cute animals

I want you to see it all over the years

As they all change and grow, so will you

I hope that you see the beauty that surrounds us

 

More than just what you can see with your eyes

I hope that you can see and appreciate much more

The beauty within the souls of those in your life

May you see the kindness, gentility, and grace

And may you also possess these traits yourself

 

May you show kindness to others, even on a rough day

Show compassion and understanding to those who need it

And yet be firm when the situation calls for it as well

See the beauty all around you and be the beauty for others

That is my sincerest prayer for you, my darling daughter.

Love Is

Love-Heals

Love isn’t perfect. for those who feel it aren’t

It’s only as strong as we allow it to be

It can be blind, fall into an ignorant state of bliss

But it can also heal wounds that time alone can’t

 

Love will see difficult days and darker nights

There will be disagreements, struggles, and pain

It will take individuals committed to get through

Its success or failure rides upon our efforts

 

Love won’t stop the hurdles from coming

But it can help us jump over them, if we allow it to

If we but see the strength within it, within us

It will become as limitless as we allow it to be

No Shame in Walking Away

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When you see someone you love in need

Often times the first instinct is to help out

You want to erase all pain, sorrow, & doubt

To see their minds at ease & hearts freed

 

Sometimes, things work out for those we love

Our efforts are successful & they’re grateful

Other times, things go awry and instead they’re hateful

Or we’re simply taken for granted & we cry to heaven above

 

Why is that sometimes those who are supposed to be closest to us

Are the ones that cause us the most heartache & pain

It should be easy to walk away from those only interested in what they can gain

But when there’s bonds that tie, it’s often not easy to leave without a fuss

 

Sometimes we never find the strength to walk away

For we’re family, family sticks together always, right?

Other times though, we rid the toxic from our sight

And we see there’s no shame in not wanting to stay

 

We ought to look out for one another, especially our family

But there’s nothing wrong with not tolerating abuse

Sometimes we find after trying to help for so long, what’s the use?

One can only try for so long before they need to set themselves free.

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