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I saw a post on Facebook today that my cousin shared about not regretting your past, no matter how many mistakes you made or what they were. Everything that was done in all of your yesterdays has shaped you into who you are today.

It is easy to put yourself down for mistakes you’ve made and to regret choices made in the past. “If only I hadn’t done….” or “I wish I never would have said….” And sometimes we beat ourselves up even more for things we wished we had said or done, but for reasons of our own, we didn’t.

Something I have learned over the years is, what’s done is done. Beating yourself up over the past doesn’t change anything. And as for things not done, either it wasn’t the right time for those things to happen or maybe they just weren’t meant to happen at all. That is for you to determine. If you still feel that you should go out and do something, don’t make the excuse that your time has passed. If it is something that means a lot to you and it can be accomplished, go for it! If it’s something you know was only for a certain time, then you need to let it go. Either way, find ways to make peace with what was and with what is. And never stop dreaming and working towards what can be.

I used to berate myself over the many bad choices I made, the people I hurt, and the people I trusted that hurt me. I put myself down for the person I was and I held myself back from becoming who I wanted to be. I thought I couldn’t be someone worthy of respect, trust, true friendship, and love. I thought I was destined to mess up and be alone.

Looking back, I am glad I didn’t hold onto those views and that eventually, with a lot of support and love, I overcame the old me. As alone as I thought I was, I realized I had more people beside me than I ever knew. But, it was more than that, I realized there was more to me than my mistakes and my dysfunctional past. I could overcome all of it and be someone I was proud to be. Every mistake, lesson learned the hard way, broken heart, and bad thing that has happened has made me into who I am today. I no longer beat myself up over or regret the paths I took, the things I did that, the people I spent my time with, or what has happened to me.

And, I would use my past to help others learn that they can also overcome theirs and that they too can be what and who they want to be. I feel that we all have untapped potential, can learn and grow all the days of our lives, can inspire as much as we’ve been inspired, can give so much, and be the person we want to be. The past may be written, but the future hasn’t been yet. So, I urge everyone who reads this to take comfort in that and to never give up on themselves. No matter how dark your days were, know that they can get brighter if you allow them to. Don’t let your past define you. Allow your past to make you into who you long to be.


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