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Archive for July, 2014

Every Storm Runs Out of Rain

Heavy Downpour

It’s been pouring for months now

Your heart feels like it’s drowning

When will it all end?

I don’t think I can take much more…

 

Your friends told you that in time the pain would fade

And before you knew it, things would be alright again

But the storm within doesn’t show any signs of stopping

Hearing that everything will be okay has gotten old

 

I urge you to look at it this way though

Every storm runs out of rain eventually

For everyone, it happens at its own time and pace

So don’t get discouraged when it doesn’t happen right away

 

Just don’t give up, don’t let the storm win out

Learn how to swim, remember how to fight your way through

Nothing will be the same as it was

But it can still become wonderful once more

 

You can’t expect time to just heal all wounds

For pain to just get up and walk away

It takes a lot of effort on your part to heal and move forward

It’s not an easy thing to do most times, but it’s integral to your well-being

 

The sun will shine on you, if you have the strength to find it

Stand tall in the rain and push forward

The dark nights will eventually come to an end

And without realizing it, your heart will have begun to mend

 

 

 

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Always Within My Heart

Always In My Heart

If only there was a way to visit Heaven

I would make regular trips there

Meet family members who died before I was born

See firsthand what they were like

 

And there are those that died when I was young

When they left, I barely knew them

So I’d spend some time changing that

Talking and getting to know one another

 

I would take Zach to meet his family as well

Let him see where he comes from

My how he looks like his granddad when he was young

Wouldn’t it be fun to watch them play chess?

 

Maybe while I was there, I’d talk to Kennedy, Lincoln, & Eisenhower too

Find Edgar Allen Poe, Emily Dickinson, & Shakespeare as well

Do you think Judy Garland would sing with me?

All of heaven could listen to Frank Sinatra croon 

 

I would save the best for last and seek out those I was closest to

Enjoying every minute together & holding on for as long as I could

And perhaps then if I could see that they’re in a better place

It would be easier for me to handle that they’re gone

 

My heart aches thinking of all the empty seats at dinner tables tonight

Wishing they were still with us, even for just a little while longer

Looking at your pictures isn’t the same as seeing you face to face

As time passes on, the pain never really fades

 

But sometimes imagining I could come see you where you are

Just to know you’re all alright, no longer suffering

It helps me to be able to let you go

And to remember that the world still turns, with or without you

 

Know that every single day you are all missed by many

That you’re legacies will continue to live on inside others

And I will do my best to honor your memories by continuing to live

Sharing the love, laughter, and joy that you gave to others

 

While I know I can’t see or hear you anymore

I do know a part of you is with me

Even if there isn’t a road that leads me straight to you

I can always find you within my heart

 

 

 

 

It’s All A Matter of Perspective

pastpresentfuture
It really all is a matter of perspective. For all the jobs I wanted and didn’t get, relationships that fell apart, friendships that didn’t last, mistakes I made, times I was disappointed, every loss I suffered, each lesson I learned the hard way, and all the hard times I went through has led me to where I am now. For years I wondered why the things I wanted most often didn’t work out the way that I wanted them to. But now looking back, I would not go back and change anything because if I did, I would not have the life that I do now. I thank God for each and every struggle I have faced, for every single thing that has happened to me, and everything that I have done that has led me to where and who I am today, just as all that happens now shapes who I will become tomorrow.

Yes, I am still alive and well…..

I just wanted to let you all know that I am still alive and doing well, actually better than I ever have before. As I shared in my last post, I got engaged on June 21st. Then, on July 1st, my boss where I have been a temporary employee called me into the office at the end of the day to let me know they’d made a decision of the job I’d interviewed for with them and the decision was that they wanted to bring me on board. As of July 21st, I will be an official full time employee there and I am so happy. This is only the third job in my life that I have truly loved and of the three, only the second where I both loved what I did and not only my fellow co-workers, but my bosses as well. This is also the best paying job I have ever had. Given that Doug and I are paying for most of the wedding ourselves, it’s nice knowing that soon I will be able to really help out with that and around here financially a lot more.

I have such amazing friends and many wonderful family members that love me and support me in my dreams and life goals. My son is key to a lot of my joy as well. He’s gearing up for the sixth grade and for another year of playing football. He’s having some issues with behavior still, but we’re working with him…all four of us. (His dad, myself, his step-mom, and Doug.) We want what is best for him and we’re committed to helping him. He is very excited for football, so we want to encourage that, may that be an outlet for his aggression and help him get out that pent up energy. He’ll be wrestling again this fall/winter too. That should help, along with our talks, keeping him busy, etc. He is excited for the upcoming wedding and his role in it, as am I. I can hardly wait to have him walk me down the aisle. He is so happy for us and I am happy that he and Doug have bonded, that Zach also now has two very stable homes.

I am blessed beyond belief and I pray for those around me, that they will either come to know the kind of good life that I finally found or that if they already have it, that they don’t take it for granted and are happy with what they have. We all do that now and then, forget how good we have it and complain. I am trying harder to be better about that. The truth is, as previously stated this is the best my life has ever been. Thank you, Lord for the wonderful life you have given me and the outstanding people I get to spend it with. (this includes each of you as well!) I am off for the day, got a lot to do with my family. Have a blessed day, make the most of the time you’re given!315506_271449742877019_130983066923688_950332_1701207646_n

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