It’s been a little over a month since my last update, so here I am again to give the masses a run down of what’s been going on. Some of you follow my posts regularly, some even talk to me frequently, but there are things that get left out and also many I don’t talk to often or even really at all…but we like to know how the other is doing, so here I am to keep you all informed. F.Y.I: If you would like to be on the list of people I tag, let me know and the same also goes for if you’d rather not be tagged. 😉
Okay. So. As many of you know, my grandma had a stroke nearly two weeks ago now. It’s been rough since she came home, but we’ve been trying really hard to make this work. And today so far, she’s had a pretty good day. I have been able to understand most of her speech and she hasn’t fallen. Thank you God for that, even one good day is a blessing. I worry so much about her these days, can’t imagine how I’d feel if things had gone differently. She has been a rock for me for many years and I love and respect her with all I have. So, I am doing what I can to give back, to be her rock now. I want her remaining time here to be happy, for her to be comfortable, to be at home. I didn’t know it’d be this rough when I agreed to take care of her, but I know I am doing the right thing. This is what’s best for her and for me. This is helping us grow closer together and me grow as a person. God knew I’d need this experience in my life, that it would teach me and so far, it has taught me a lot and I am sure it’s going to teach me a lot more about who I am, about growing up, about responsibility. I am already becoming wiser, more mature, and stronger. I have a rough day sometimes and wonder how I’ll get through and wonder how my bills will be paid….but God finds a way to remind me what’s important and to trust Him, my needs always get provided for in the end.
I am still job searching, though I think nothing has panned out because Grandma has needed me. If I hadn’t been home when she had her stroke, this could have gone a lot worse. I don’t even want to consider any of those possibilities. Right now, she is healing. But, I know God will point me in the right direction soon enough and a job offer will come my way. Until then, God has found ways to keep my bills paid. It’s been rough sometimes, but here I am still, pushing ahead. Thanks to my unemployment, my security deposit, a little help from Grandma for gas when I’d run her errands, Doug, etc….I am hanging in there. I try to give back to those that help, give when I can, grab the bill when out, treat someone to a drink, etc etc. I want those of you who have helped me to know just how grateful I am to you. Thank you, thank you more than I can ever say. I love those of you have stood behind me with all I have.
Speaking of Doug, we are about to celebrate two months together. That probably doesn’t sound like much to a lot of people, but for me, this is huge. By two months, all of my other relationships were either already over or headed that way. But here we are, almost at that mark and we’re still as happy as we were when this all started. He still makes me so happy. He makes me feel like I am beautiful, special, needed, and just so very cared for. He’s right there in one way or another when I am having a rough go of it. He does things to show his affection by randomly holding my hand, putting his arm around me, kissing my forehead, kissing my hand, and so on. He’s a great listener, never judges, just listens. He makes me laugh and smile more than I have in a long time. We pick on one another, it’s so funny to watch us. He’s been my rock through a lot in such a short amount of time and as it’s turned out, I have been there for him through a lot too. We have proven we’re a great team, as friends and as a couple. We stand behind one another, encourage one another, believe in one another. We communicate well and often. I still get butterflies when I see his face, hear his voice, or even talk to him via chat or text. Being away from him for even a couple of days feels weird. My son adores him and my mom and grandma think highly of him, as do my friends that have met him, even though it’s only been briefly because they see how he treats me with care and respect and well, because he’s just an awesome guy. I am beyond happy in that aspect of my life.
Life isn’t perfect, full of issues and complications….but it is also beautiful. I am grateful for all I have. Zach will be here in 12 days and then he will be here for 11 days. It’s going to be hectic with traveling and the holidays, but it’s going to also be great and full of so much love and awesome memories to look back on. I can hardly wait for my bugger to be home. New Year’s Eve, it’s just he, Grandma, and I thus far. We’re going to eat pizza, watch movies, and have our own special countdown to ring in 2013. I am so excited for that and first Christmas, watching my kiddo open his presents over the course of many days. I am nervous, hope Doug’s family takes to him, but I think in the end, it will be fine. I am excited to spend that time with them. I am hoping to see my step-mom, brothers, sister, nephews, niece, etc over that time as well. This is a time for family. Family is important to me and I want to spend what time I can with those I have while the time is there. I know I will see my mom that time, Zach will happy for that. On the 30th, I get to see T.S.O. with Doug as a birthday gift from him and now perhaps it’s going to be a double date with Vanessa and Jason because they have tickets and as luck would have it, they’re in the same section as us. I am looking forward to that too. There is so much to look forward to, starting with seeing The Hobbit with my awesome friend Courtney which is the kickoff to my birthday festivities. I am going to be so busy!!! But being busy can be a good thing!!! And Grandma, Zach and I are going to fit in a lot of time in that 11 days to do stuff just the three of us. I want him to have a real connection with her, appreciate her and the time he as with her. Family and friends surround my holiday season and I can honestly say, I have never felt this blessed in my entire life. Thank you God for leading so many great people into my life. Well, this is a good enough update I think. 😉 I hope you enjoyed reading!!!