When you’re here
Things are generally great
You make me laugh, uncontrollably at times
I hadn’t smiled like that it what felt like ages
You have helped me begin to heal
You have been a friend to me
Always willing to listen
Letting me vent for as long as I need to
Even when you tell me you need someone to talk to
Never showing any anger or impatience
I feel all giddy and nervous when you’re near
Like a teenager discovering love
You have accepted me as I am
Taking the good with the bad
Never judging me
Thus it was I noticed
I’d fallen for my friend
It’s what I’ve always wanted
To have someone in my life
That is both my friend and my lover
So why is it I am unhappy?
Pushing for more
Because I feel I’m pulling most of the weight
Bending my schedule to meet your needs
Feeling unappreciated for my sacrifices
Once you’re with me
All feels well
I have my friend
To talk to, to laugh with
Someone who is there for me
I have my lover
To kiss, to hold
The one who never pushes me away
When I just need to be held
Someone who makes me smile
But your fear of commitment
Your hatred for titles
Holding me at arms length
When I try to take this a step further
I feel crushed inside
Should I hold my tongue?
Should I speak my mind?
I fear you’ll run away if I say something
And I want you to stay
I feel so torn inside
I want to be with someone who cares
And this I know you do
But is it enough?
Do I wait?
Will your walls of steel ever come down?
Will you ever be ready to really be with me?
To introduce me to the people in your life?
I keep asking myself
Do I wait?
And if so, how long?
I try not to nitpick
To enjoy what is
But these nagging feelings keep eating at me
If I keep my mouth shut
Perhaps you’ll stay
And then perhaps if I wait long enough
You’ll see what you have standing in front of you
We’ll move forward together
Growing the friendship
Taking the love to new heights
But perhaps I’d see I waited for nothing
That you’d never be ready
And I passed on chances to be truly happy
Such a tough call
So unsure of what to do
I have been here before
There is a time and place for things
A time to wait and a time to go
I want to go places with you
For what we have to grow
Sometimes I see that you want that too
But there’s always something holding you back
I know your past has been rough
But mine has been too
And I just want to move beyond it, with you
When you look at me
I see so much
I can feel the joy
Sense the fear
And taste the passion
When you’re with me
I feel as if it’s where you truly want to be
I don’t feel like second best
What’s between us is real
The heat, the passion, the compassion, the friendship
When I cry
You hold me
When I’m stressed
You try to make me laugh
You always seem to know how to be there
So are my issues just me thinking too much?
Expecting too much too soon?
Am I sending another relationship down the tubes?
I sit here and ask myself so many questions
Trying to figure everything out
Are my issues validated?
Do I have reason for concern?
Do I speak my mind?
Will you listen?
Will you run?
If I speak my mind
Will you stick around?
Will you run away?
Will you listen?
Again, I want to know if you’ll stay?